A Girl Checks Her Weight = 58kg .
Removes Sandal = 56.
Then Dupatta = 52
Now Coins Finished.......
.
.
.
.
A Boy In A Q Behind Her
Said
Ü Carry On"",
I Have Coins!
~ Romance Mathematics ~
Smart Man + Smart Woman =
Romance
Smart Man + Dumb Woman = Affair
Dumb Man + Smart Woman =
Marriage
Dumb Man + Dumb Woman =
Pregnancy
If u r stressed, you'll get pimples..
if u cry,u'll get wrinkles..
So, y don't u smile & get dimples?
I have lots of jokes in my inbox,
But I can’t send you all of them,
It will take a lot of time,
So I’m sending you just 1 joke
.
.
.
“You are so beautiful”
God made us body parts for a reason.
Eyes: to look at you
Hands: to pray for you
Mind: to remember you
Heart: to miss you
and…
Legs: to kick you if u ever forget me!!
Wife:-I will die.
Husband:- I will also die.
Wife:-why will you die?
Husband:- because I can't bear that
much happiness
Gang of Santa-Banta broke a bank,
but instead of cash they find
bottles of chilled red wine...
happily they drink and left
next day headline
~ Braking News ~
"Blood Bank Robbed"
Aftr robbing d Bank, robber 2 clerk:
Did u see me robbing?
Clerk: Yes.
Robber shot him dead & asked d next
clerk: Did u?
2nd clerk: No, But my wife saw u!
Husband: Kal mere khawab main ek
larki aye thi. Wah! Kia Larki thee!
Wife: Akeli ayee hogi?
Husband: Tum ko kese pata?
Wife: Uska Husband mere khawab
main aya tha!
mehrbaan kadardaan dekho mere
sms ka kamaal
ghanti bajegi bander nachega
mobile uthayega sms padega ab
muskurayega
ab banda hoshiyari dikhayega or msg
forward karega
Birdy birdy in the sky dropped a
poopy in my eye,
I don't worry I don't cry,
I'm just happy that cows can't fly!
Keep.....................IN TOUCH WID ME.....
OTHERWISE............................1 2 3 4 5 6
7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20
21 22 23 24 25 26
27 28 29 30 31 32 ALL..........UR TEETH
WILL B BROKEN!!!
Q: What is the difference b/w
secretary & private secretary?
Ans:
Secretary says GOOD MORNING SIR
&
Private secretary says ITS MORNING
SIR
A baby monkey asks his father, Father
why r we so ugly?
The father says to him, don't stress my
son
u should see the one who is reading
this!!
Q: Why dogs don't marry?
A: Bcoz they are already leading a
dog's life!
If i need "Brain Transplantation" I will
prefer your brain...
don't think that you are a genius..........
i need a brain which is never used
before
Father: How did you fail the final
exam?
Son: Under water
Aather: What do you mean?
Son :All below 'C' level
Send to Friends
A,B,C,D,E,F,G,H,I-------------------------------------------------------------------
U,V,W,X,Y,Z.
WHAT R U LOOKING FOR?
I KILLED ALL THOSE WHO WERE
BETWEEN I & U
Banta owned a factory.
He issued orders that only married
men would be employed.
Friend asks: Why this ?
Bant reply:
Because married men are more
obedient.
Government of Australia has
introduced a new rule
Good looking people should be
thrown out of country!!!
U r safe..
oh! No where should I Hide you???
Husband: Today is Sunday & I have to
enjoy it. So i bought 3 movie tickets.
Wife: why three?
Husband: 4 u and ur parents.
2 days of power cut in Delhi had
made life miserable worst affected
was "Delhi metro station"
where families of Santa and Banta
were stuck for 48 hrs on.... Escalators
Son - I want a baby brother .
Mom - your dad is overseas. When he
comes back we will talk over it .
Son - why don't u give him a surprise?
A newly married girl got first class in
her B.Ed exams.
Her husband sent telegram to her
parents -
Ruby First Class in Bed!
Close your eyes I have a gift for you
1
2
3
Oh u didn't close your eyes!!!!!
What is a difference between a Kiss, a
Car and a Monkey?
A kiss is so dear,
a car is too dear and
a monkey is U dear.
What do u call a woman in heaven? -
An Angel.
A crowd of woman in heaven? - A
host of Angels.
And all woman in heaven? - PEACE ON
EARTH!
Banta falls in luv wit a nurse..
After much thinking, he finally writes a
luv letter 2 her: "I LUV U SISTER"
MBBS Final Exam:-
Question: Fill in the blanks.
If a lady faints, we must 1st check her
PU_S_
Only few intelligent students wrote
PULSE
What is diffrence between problem &
talent?
2 boys love 1 girl= problem!
1 boy love 2 girls= talent.
Girl : Mom, i m in love with a guy..
Mom shocked : How old is the boy &
what is he doing Girl : 3 month &
kicking happily in my stomach..
terrorists have kidnapped our
lecturers... and demanded aransom
of 500000 rs or else they will burn
them with kerosene... plz donate. i
have donated 15 litres.
can you lend me 2000 Rs? i need it.
please help me out, i know you have
it, i wil return it .a Banta asks to ATM
machine???????
Why do couples hold hands during
their wedding day?.?.?.?.... It is just a
formality, like two boxers shaking
hands b4 the fight begins !
One day Raja and rani decided to
send messages to each other by using
Pigeon instead of mobile. The very
next day pigeon reached raja without
any message. He angried and called to
rani.She told stupid "This was a
missed call"
><(((:>I send dis fish as a sign of
friendship Plz take care of it & keep it
in mobile & daily put ur mobile in
water so tat fish wont DIE:-)
God made man and then rested. God
made women and then no one rested
The rain makes all things beautiful.
The grass & flowers 2. If rain makes all
things beautiful why doesn’t it rain on
you?
Banta road se gujar raha tha,
achanak
usne jhuk kar road se kuch uthaya
or
jor se chillaya....
Kamine
tatti v aise karte hai jaise SAMOSA
pada ho.
aaj raat
.
.
.
12 baje ke bad
.
.
.
ek bajega [hi hi hi]
''Utha le re deva,utha le''....
'eeee''mere ko nai re baba'
'mere yaar ko utha re'....
eeesh..''duniya se nai re deva''...
''NIND'' se uthare
GOOD MORNING
Send to Friends
twinkle twinkle lazy star ,
kitna soyega uthja yaar,
up above the world so high,
sun has risen in the sky,
uthke jaldi PEE LE CHAI,
then u call and say me HI....
Anty chote puppy se: Oye hoye! kitna
sona doggy hai!
Umma.. Umma.. Umma..!
Boy: Par anty..
Anty: Oye kiss karne de!
Umma.. Umma.. Umma..!!
.
.
.
Boy: Par anty iska muh idhar nahi us
taraf hai!
u r Ultimate
u r Lovely
u r Likable
u r Unique
in short ......
u r ULLU !!!
A funny poem about TATTI
tatti meri pyaari tatti
shouchalyaki rani tatti
subh subh jab aaye tatti
ghar aagan mehkaaye tatti
peeli tatti kaali tatti
hay re meri nyaari tatti
kudrat ka dastoor niraala
sabko hi aaye hai tatti
khul ke jo na aaye tatti
sacchi bda sataaye tatti
lagataar jo aaye tatti
sabke hosh udaaye tatti
pet ke andar factory aisi
jo ki roz banaaye tatti
yeh message sabko kar dena
varna teri ruk jaayegi tatti
Son: Dad, what is an idiot?
Dad: An idiot is a person who tries to
explain his ideas in such a strange
and long way that another person
who is
listening to him can't understand him.
Do you understand me?
Son: No.
Send to Friends
Sponsored Links
@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
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@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@
ese kya dekh rahe ho? have send u
GARAM "Jalebies" aaj ka nasta meri
taraf se!!!!
Good Morning!
Girl on Valentine Day in Card Shop.
Owner: yes madam
Girl: 1 card jispar likha ho mai sirf
tumse pyr karti hu, kya hai aapke
paas?
Owner: Ha he
Girl: 12 Dedo
Can u pronounce good English:- read
along woof,
roof, loof, shoof, shoof, woof, loof,
roof,
poof, woof woof, hoof, woof, roof,
shoof.
From Mon to Sun, From Jan To Dec,
From birth till my death, my feelings 4
u
have never changed.
For me, you’ve always been…
a headache !
Could u fax me ur photo very very
urgently ?
Mind u - it’s really very very urgent,
damn serious and very imp …
I’m playing cards and we’ve misplaced
the JOKER.
Today, tomorrow and yesterday there
will be …
one heart that would always beat for
you …
You know Whose??? … your Own
Stupid!!!
Life without u is impossible,
u r in my breath and blood.
i cant stay for a second without u,
if u r not there i am dead
oye hello i am talking about OXYGEN
Pappu, while filling up a form: Dad,
what should I write for mother
tongue.?
Santa: Very long!
I have a confession to make
ever since i met u its been hard for
me to 4get u
every night i see u in my dreams
and find myself shouting
GHOST GHOST
7 Angels come to me & asked for
the most
Intelligent
Smart
Nice
Sweet
Well Behaved
Well Groomed person
So i Gave them your address.
DEKHA
Kaisa oollu banaya unko
Yaar aaj ka din bada fuddu hai....
Fuddu se yaad aaya
Kaisa hai tu..!!
twinkle twinkle little star
tera boy friend gaya bazar
us ko mil gaya doosra pyar
ab tu beth ker makhyan maaar
i want u 2 know dat our friendship
means alot 2 me.U cry i cry.U lauf i
lauf.U jump out of da window... I look
down & den... i lauf again
The animals of a jungle have decided
to hold a meeting. The lion has come,
the tiger has come, the elephant has
come, the monkey has come.. But The
meeting hasn’t started. Guess why ?
Because the Donkey is busy reading
this SMS!
Santa GAON gaya,
BUS se Utarte hi MITTI HATH me
Uthakar Bola- 'Gaon ki Mitti ki
Khushbu hi Alag hai'
Banta- SAALE Thik se dekh MITTI nahi
'TATTI' hai.
The more I learn the more I get to
know,
the more I know the more I forget,
the more I forget the less I know,
so why should I be learning??
Hello, this is GOD. I make few bad
creations but you are the worst
monster I ever realised. My apologies
on behalf of the whole world.
Sweet candies are nice to eat …
Sweet words are easy to say …
but, sweet ppl are hard to find …
OH MY GOD! how did u find me?
A couple visit a art gallery,
husband keeps watching a Photo of a
girl covered by leaves
wife ask him "ab chele?... ya ... hawaa
aane ke bad?.................
ek kaam kar
.
.
.
.
..
tu na...
.
.
.
.
.
ish msg ko delete kar de.
1 bacha roj mandir se chapal churata
tha,
ek din sare chapal bech ke 1 mobile
kharida,
aaj wahi bacha apni story pad raha
hai apni mobile pe :)
Girl: when we get married, i want to
share all your worries, troubles and
lighten your burden. boy: it's very kind
of you, darling, but i don't have any
worries or troubles. girl: well that is
because we aren't married yet
Newton's Law of Romance LOVE CAN
NEITHER BE CREATED NOR BE
DESTROYED, IT CAN ONLY BE
CHANGED FROM ONE GIRL FRIEND TO
ANOTHER
Twinkle twinkle little star,
you should know what you are,
and once you know what you are,
Mental hospital is not so far.
Q: If a devil catches ur wife, wat wud
u do?
A: U can do nothing. If devil has
committed a mistake let him face the
consequences.
Send to Friends
Its INTERNATIONAL GOOD LOOKING
DAY! send this to someone that you
think is gorgeous, dont send it to me
as I have had 100s already
This message was sent exclusively for
the handsome and the beautiful. We
have obviously sent it to the wrong
number. We are truly sorry for the
inconvenience
Marriage:
It's an agreement in which a man
loses his bachelor degree and a
woman gains her master
girl friends are like mobile phone,
whenever you want happiness just
check inbox, whenever u want to cry
check out box, and whenever u want
to enjoyment just plug in your charger
and enjoy.
Husband asks, Do you know the
meaning of WIFE.
It means...Without Information
Fighting Everytime!
WIFE satys No, it means -
With Idiot for Ever.
PRINCIPAL :Agar koi ladka girls hostel
mein gaya toh first time 100 Rs fine,
2nd time 200 Rs. Fine and 3rd time
500.
MUNNA BHAI :Boley to Monthly paas
ka kya lega Mamu
MAMU :Oye, maar gayea yaar. Meri
biwi aur premika saath saath aa rehla
hain.
MAMU KA DOST :Arrey, mein bhi yehi
bolnewala tha.
MAMU :Chand toh raat ko nikalta hai,
aaj din mein kaise nikal aya?
GIRL :Ullu to raat ko bolta hai, aaj din
mein kaise bol pada?
